Thursday, August 27, 2009

You ask why I don't write about myself more often? Probably because of the occasional cyberstalker

It's not hard to spot a cyberstalker. You start coming across suspicious looking searchphrases like these, which I've had in the last couple of hours:

nick van der leek sun international
nick van der leek and fransa
nick van der leek sowetan

Now I know the stats on my own website pretty well, so it sticks out when there are more than just a handful, but multiple searches for nick van der leek sun international

What it is, is digging for dirt. It's a bit like rifling through someone's desk papers or through their garbage. It's not something you do everyday, but you're here looking for something specific. You do it because you're looking for something from the person to use against the person, and to make sure your dirty laundry hasn't been hung out to dry. So I know who this is.

People have asked me why I went from writing on a daily basis about some of my feelings to almost no daily postings. Well, it's because of this sort of thing. There are some bad apples out there, and this is what they're doing with their time. A colleague or a friend or a newly disenchanted individual decides to look for shit. They're not going to talk to you or try to find a decent solution; because I am not a human being that someone can phone up or approach and have a civilised conversation with - oh no this is about ego satisfaction. It's one way narcissim. It's about being vindictive and spiteful, and feeling completely entitled to do this.

The irony is, people think they visit your website anonymously, but you can track what time they're visiting, and from what location, down to the suburb, and the ultimate giveaway, the URL, which gives a pretty clear indication who, what and why.

And since I know this is going on, it makes me wonder whether it was a good idea to let sleeping, lying dogs lie. I guess it's a question of not owning up to mistakes, and then feeling guilty about it afterwards. It's weird - someone accuses you falsely and feels completely justified running behind your back and looking for shit; and no apology necessary when they're caught out, and wrong. You do the same in response, and with quite a lot of justification, and there's this violent exception to it. Odd is the word.

By the way, here's how you spell the word SOMERSAULT.


Anonymous said...

"waking sleeping dogs usually result in a nasty bite."
Certain people obviously want to rile u and retaliation is often what they are after. I think ignoring them is often better. Shame, its sad to think there are so many small minded fools out there, who have little else to do with their time.

Nick said...

Sure enough I find a little brown envelope on my desk today. What do they say? Small things amuse small minds.