This psychology is based on: 'if I win, you lose.' I call it the 'white trash mentality'. The movie KILL BILL epitomises this perfectly. KILL BILL is about payback, I at the expense of you (and you at the expense of me). In one scene Kiddo has just killed a little girl's mother in the kitchen, and, wiping the blood from the blade of a knife, condescends to say to the little girl:
"When you're grown up, if you're still feel raw about it, I'll be waiting."
The great antidote to this self-limiting, sick me vs you psychology is a charming Dr. Seuss Movie.